


i don't love you

by dkwlwk



Category: The Boyz (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Unrequited Love, angst ending, but jacob likes a girl, hyunjae has a crush on jacob
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-08
Updated: 2020-07-08
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:42:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25151836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dkwlwk/pseuds/dkwlwk
Summary: i've always been the one speaking my mindno matter how harsh the truth isi can't care less about how it may hurts othershence i never liebut that night i lied for the first timewhen i stared right into your eyessaying i don't love youmaybe i'm just scared to hurt myself
Relationships: Bae Joonyoung | Jacob/Lee Jaehyun | Hyunjae
Comments: 2
Kudos: 21





	i don't love you

**Author's Note:**

> my first completed fic ever and it's tbz!! shoutout to mun for beta-ing this! this fic is inspired by the poem in the summary that i wrote based on hyunjae’s gen z 
> 
> beware: mentioned het content ahead & angst ending

The bright study light illuminating the room and the white papers of his notes are starting to hurt Hyunjae’s eyes. His eyelids are getting heavier and he just wants to sleep right there and then. But he knows if he does, Jacob will end up having to carry him to the bedroom. That had happened before, and he still feels bad for Jacob.

He lets out a deep sigh; across the table he can see Jacob who is visibly tired but still trying his best to go through his flashcards. Hyunjae lost count of the amount of times that Jacob pouted. _Nope, he is definitely not staring at Jacob._ They started studying at 9pm and now that the clock already struck 1am, Hyunjae begins to wonder why Jacob isn’t stopping. Hyunjae raises his voice, “Jacob, I think that’s it for today. It’s already late and we should rest.”

“Really? What time is it?” Jacob asks, looking up at Hyunjae while tilting his head with his doe eyes and pursed lips.

Hyunjae’s heart somersaults. _How can someone look this adorable at 1am?_

“1:15am. Let’s grab some snacks, on me” Hyunjae exclaims.

Jacob throws his hands up in the air, excited. As they’re clearing up their study materials, Hyunjae glances at Jacob and thinks about how he can be too engrossed in whatever he’s working on to the point that he forgets the concept of time. That’s just how hardworking he is. Only God knows until what time he will end up studying if Hyunjae doesn’t stop him. Once, he even slept at dawn because he was running on coffee. _Jacob really needs to take care of himself more, rest is important, and work can wait_.

The walk to the convenience store is filled with hushed laughter of them joking and teasing each other. Many still wonder how this too-kind-to-be-a-jock Jacob became best friends with this handsome-school-trickster Hyunjae. It’s just that they have been close since young, back when Jacob was a shy kid who followed his brother everywhere he went and Hyunjae was a competitive kid who wanted to win in every game.

They were different, still are and despite their differences, they are comfortable with each other. Some even thought that they would drift apart as they entered high school, but they didn’t and that’s the most important thing. _Although recently Hyunjae started to feel things that he shouldn’t towards Jacob and he’s nothing but afraid, so he doesn’t act upon it._

After buying snacks, they sat on the bench under the dim streetlight at the playground near the store. The cold air bothers Hyunjae, but the sight of Jacob happily munching his snack warms his heart. “Is it that good? Or are you just hungry?” Hyunjae asks, his eyes shaping into crescents as he holds back his grin. _Jacob is just so lovely._ Naturally, they keep on talking as they eat.

Midnight talks are the best, especially with the one that you care for and often it’s when you are most vulnerable. Everything is fine until Jacob asks, “Hyunjae, I wonder why you’re still single. You… You basically are the talk of the school,” and that’s how Hyunjae chokes on his sandwich.

Jacob, upon realizing that Hyunjae is now choking, quickly gives him water and comforts him, saying that it’s fine if he doesn’t feel like answering. Hyunjae, now carefully eating his sandwich, shakes his head, chuckling, “Yeah sadly I’m still single. I only had my first kiss that I told you about but that was all. Now don’t tell me you already had your first kiss without me even knowing. Also, no, why would I be uncomfortable? You should know damn well that you will be the first person I tell if I ever date someone.”

Jacob looks down, muttering “No, I haven’t yet. I’m saving my first kiss for someone special.”

Hyunjae’s heart sinks as he hears those words. How lucky that someone special is? He wishes that he can be that lucky someone, but luck has never been on his side. Hyunjae dares to ask, “Ooh do you happen to have someone special in your mind?” Unexpectedly, Hyunjae feels Jacob’s fingers brushing against his, as Jacob pulls them away yet Hyunjae’s frantic heartbeats stay. _It was just a slight touch, but he already makes me go insane._

Jacob, still looking down, shyly answering “Y-yeah I do. Whenever I see her, I just get this kind of feelings you know? At first, I thought my stomach was sick, but that’s weird because I only feel it when I’m with her. I think people call them butterflies in your stomach? Yeah, that. I still remember being so worried when she was absent one day. When I started to write songs about her, that was when I finally realized- Ah this is my first time telling someone, sorry if I got too excited.”

_Her. It’s a her. Of course it would be._

“Do I know her?” Hyunjae asks, with a smile on his face. He knows he should feel happy for his best friend and he already expects this, still it hurts. Jacob mentioned an all too familiar name, a mutual friend and she’s Hyunjae’s neighbor as well. Out of all people. His neighbor. Jacob has a crush on his neighbor. Deep inside, he knows. He just does.

Jacob usually doesn’t wear his heart on his sleeves, not as much as Hyunjae, but it’s getting more obvious day by day. For some reason, lately Jacob insists on hanging out at his house. Last month when Hyunjae’s family held a house party, he remembers Jacob being so nervous that he even bought a new set of clothes (the theme was casual for fuck’s sake). He remembers the way Jacob glanced at her when the whole room was laughing. Just her. _While Hyunjae stared at Jacob, but that’s another story._

Jacob looks at him, his cheeks still faintly blushing “I wonder if you ever felt this way for someone too.”

“Hmm, no. Not yet. Hopefully one day, I really want to experience such thrill too and those butterflies that you described, but right now my stomach still feels fine most days.” He grins as he dares himself to look directly into Jacob’s deep eyes.

_And that night Hyunjae lies to Jacob for the first time._

  
  



End file.
